After people find out that I am pregnant, their next question is always, "Do you know what you are having?" When I inform them that we aren't finding out the baby's sex, they either want to know why or lecture me on why I should change my mind. Since I haven't gone around to people who have found out the baby's sex and lectured them on why I find that wrong, I find it very irritating and rude that people are constantly doing this to me.
When did finding out the sex of the baby become so important? I don't know if it because I have lost so many pregnancies or because I am just so traditional, but I honestly feel as though the life of the child should be celebrated over the sex of the child. I could care less if we have a boy or a girl, just as long as we have a baby that is alive, healthy and well. I want to concentrate all of my energy on that, not something as superficial as the baby's sex. Plus this is the only surprise that I will ever get in my entire life. I can't wait to push the baby out and find out then what the sex of the baby is. Now that will be a surprise.
People are concerned about how we are going to get the room ready if we don't know the baby's sex. In my mind, it's pretty easy. You get neutrals. Our house is already full of earth tones, which are primarily neutral colors. Thus, we will pull off of these colors to get the nursery ready. Besides, I'm not that worried about material things. Again I want to focus on the life of the baby, not on materialistic things. I'm okay with boys wearing pink and girls wearing blue. For me, the color of the clothes means nothing and I find it kinda funny on how concerned some parents get on making sure that people know the sex of their child. I guess I see it as I know what the sex of my child is, so really what does it matter what other people think. But, everyone has different opinions on this, which is fine. I'm just asking for people to respect my decision to be surprised by the baby's sex at the birth.
I mean who doesn't like a good surprise?
Friday, July 29, 2011
18 Week Appointment
My eighteen week appointment took place on July 18th. It was pretty much the same as all the other appointments up to this point. Mark was able to come after missing the last appointment as he had the day off.
I lost another three pounds, bringing the weight loss total up to around fifteen pounds. Mark was super concerned about this and the doctor's concern is growing as well. Her biggest concern is that I need to stay hydrated enough as dehydration while pregnant is super bad. I drink a lot of water, as I have completely given up caffeine and soda (although I still do drink Ginger Ale), but I obviously need to make more of an effort to drink water. Mark is concerned that the baby's health is being affected since I'm not eating. The doctor wants me to keep trying to get down small amounts of food and is hoping that I won't lose anymore weight between now and my next appointment. Depending on the amount of weight lost, she may want to try other options.
Besides that everything else was fine. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat again and were told to make our ultrasound appointment for the 20th week. (She had told me to make the appointment at my last appointment, but the last three times I have called the August schedule has been unavailable. After the appointment, we went to try to make the appointment again, but still the schedule is not available.) The doctor also wants me to do the glucose test either before or right after my next appointment as diabetes runs in my family and I'm overweight. She really wanted me to do it now, but was afraid I would throw it all up since I am still so sick. I kinda think she was right about that.
My next appointment is on August 11th and the ultrasound is scheduled for August 1st.
I lost another three pounds, bringing the weight loss total up to around fifteen pounds. Mark was super concerned about this and the doctor's concern is growing as well. Her biggest concern is that I need to stay hydrated enough as dehydration while pregnant is super bad. I drink a lot of water, as I have completely given up caffeine and soda (although I still do drink Ginger Ale), but I obviously need to make more of an effort to drink water. Mark is concerned that the baby's health is being affected since I'm not eating. The doctor wants me to keep trying to get down small amounts of food and is hoping that I won't lose anymore weight between now and my next appointment. Depending on the amount of weight lost, she may want to try other options.
Besides that everything else was fine. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat again and were told to make our ultrasound appointment for the 20th week. (She had told me to make the appointment at my last appointment, but the last three times I have called the August schedule has been unavailable. After the appointment, we went to try to make the appointment again, but still the schedule is not available.) The doctor also wants me to do the glucose test either before or right after my next appointment as diabetes runs in my family and I'm overweight. She really wanted me to do it now, but was afraid I would throw it all up since I am still so sick. I kinda think she was right about that.
My next appointment is on August 11th and the ultrasound is scheduled for August 1st.
14 Week Appointment
On June 21st, I had my 14 week appointment. Although they try to schedule your appointments on the month marks (12, 16, 20, etc), that isn't always possible. Thus you usually just get an appointment every four weeks, which for me has turned out to be in the midpoint of the months.
Like all the appointments before this, I checked in at the front desk, waited about five minutes and then was called back by a tech (nurse). I then get weighed (my most unfavorite part as the scale is usually showing more and more weight loss - if I wasn't pregnant I would be juiced by this) and taken to the exam room. There the tech takes my temp and my blood pressure. They usually ask a few questions, like if I have had any pain, any sudden loss of fluid, any bleeding. Then they leave and I wait about five minutes for the doctor to come.
Once the doctor comes, she looks over the records and makes a comment about the weight loss. I had lost another 2 pounds at this appointment. She is super kind and very empathic, which makes me feel very at ease. She usually reminds me to keep doing all the things I have been doing to stop the nausea. She prescribed me Zoflan to try and counteract the nausea since I had now begun throwing up a few times a day. Unfortunately, Zoflan only makes me sicker, so after trying it four times, I gave up on it.
After asking some more questions, she has me lie down on the exam table and pull up my shirt. She uses a portable Doppler to listen to the baby's heartbeat. I get butterflies every time I am able to hear it. After this, I'm free to go.
Like all the appointments before this, I checked in at the front desk, waited about five minutes and then was called back by a tech (nurse). I then get weighed (my most unfavorite part as the scale is usually showing more and more weight loss - if I wasn't pregnant I would be juiced by this) and taken to the exam room. There the tech takes my temp and my blood pressure. They usually ask a few questions, like if I have had any pain, any sudden loss of fluid, any bleeding. Then they leave and I wait about five minutes for the doctor to come.
Once the doctor comes, she looks over the records and makes a comment about the weight loss. I had lost another 2 pounds at this appointment. She is super kind and very empathic, which makes me feel very at ease. She usually reminds me to keep doing all the things I have been doing to stop the nausea. She prescribed me Zoflan to try and counteract the nausea since I had now begun throwing up a few times a day. Unfortunately, Zoflan only makes me sicker, so after trying it four times, I gave up on it.
After asking some more questions, she has me lie down on the exam table and pull up my shirt. She uses a portable Doppler to listen to the baby's heartbeat. I get butterflies every time I am able to hear it. After this, I'm free to go.
The Never Ending Sickness
I'm only going to make a few posts on this topic because I am really torn on it. When you're not pregnant and trying to get pregnant, it is one of the most irritating things in the world to listen to people talk about being sick, or sore boobs, or peeing all the time, or any of pregnancy's other discomforts. When you're trying to conceive, you would give anything in the world to be sicker than a dog if it meant that you were carrying a child. I still have this belief and thus am trying really hard to not make a big deal out of being sick. I am beyond thankful of this pregnancy and don't in any way want to give off the idea or perception that I am unhappy about it.
With that being said, being sick has been a huge part of my pregnancy. Thus, I have decided to do a post on it because it has gotten to the point where the doctor is beginning to become concerned.
Since my sixth week of pregnancy I have been plagued by being sick for a large majority of the day. I'm fine in the morning, but around 11 am or noon, the tides begin to change. Nausea then takes over and I am beyond sick for the remainder of the day. Most days I don't throw up although I feel that if I did, I would feel so much better. Instead, I am just so nauseous and motion sick that walking causes me pain. It is a trial to get through the work day. As soon as I get home, I find myself lying down on the bed or couch and that is where I remain until bedtime. Let's just say this has made doing school work a major problem.
Since I have been so sick, I rarely if ever eat. I have lost around ten pounds. The doctor put me on vitamin B6 to try and counteract the nauseous. It does very little for me. I have tried everything known to man to help with the nausea, but nothing works. I've tried teas, ginger, peppermint, sea sickness bands, Saltines, small snacks, Prego Pops, fresh ginger, etc. Mark is freaked out beyond words and is constantly trying to force food down my throat. Although I appreciate his concern and love for me, it just makes it worse.
The smells of almost all foods make me sick, especially meat. I haven't had any real cravings, so nothing sounds yummy, except for juice. I have developed a real love for juice and drink quite a bit of it everyday. It is one of the only things I am able to get down that doesn't make me feel even worse.
In addition to the all day sickness, let me just say that my boobs are killing me. I mean I literally cry some days because they are so sore and tender. Plus they are already growing in size! Already?!? I thought they wouldn't start growing till the end of the pregnancy, but nope, I think I am already a cup size bigger. I know many girls who would be escatic about that, but I am already extremely large breasted. I don't want my boobs getting any bigger. Mark is excited to see how big they will really get, but I am scared out of my mind. God please don't let them get too much bigger.
Some days I am so sick that I spend the entire day in bed, rolled up in ball, crying my eyes out. However, when this happens I feel so guilty and ungrateful for the gift I have been given. This has been very hard for me to deal with as my emotions are so conflicted over expressing how awful I really feel and still keeping my gratitude for pregnancy, sickness and all.
With that being said, being sick has been a huge part of my pregnancy. Thus, I have decided to do a post on it because it has gotten to the point where the doctor is beginning to become concerned.
Since my sixth week of pregnancy I have been plagued by being sick for a large majority of the day. I'm fine in the morning, but around 11 am or noon, the tides begin to change. Nausea then takes over and I am beyond sick for the remainder of the day. Most days I don't throw up although I feel that if I did, I would feel so much better. Instead, I am just so nauseous and motion sick that walking causes me pain. It is a trial to get through the work day. As soon as I get home, I find myself lying down on the bed or couch and that is where I remain until bedtime. Let's just say this has made doing school work a major problem.
Since I have been so sick, I rarely if ever eat. I have lost around ten pounds. The doctor put me on vitamin B6 to try and counteract the nauseous. It does very little for me. I have tried everything known to man to help with the nausea, but nothing works. I've tried teas, ginger, peppermint, sea sickness bands, Saltines, small snacks, Prego Pops, fresh ginger, etc. Mark is freaked out beyond words and is constantly trying to force food down my throat. Although I appreciate his concern and love for me, it just makes it worse.
The smells of almost all foods make me sick, especially meat. I haven't had any real cravings, so nothing sounds yummy, except for juice. I have developed a real love for juice and drink quite a bit of it everyday. It is one of the only things I am able to get down that doesn't make me feel even worse.
In addition to the all day sickness, let me just say that my boobs are killing me. I mean I literally cry some days because they are so sore and tender. Plus they are already growing in size! Already?!? I thought they wouldn't start growing till the end of the pregnancy, but nope, I think I am already a cup size bigger. I know many girls who would be escatic about that, but I am already extremely large breasted. I don't want my boobs getting any bigger. Mark is excited to see how big they will really get, but I am scared out of my mind. God please don't let them get too much bigger.
Some days I am so sick that I spend the entire day in bed, rolled up in ball, crying my eyes out. However, when this happens I feel so guilty and ungrateful for the gift I have been given. This has been very hard for me to deal with as my emotions are so conflicted over expressing how awful I really feel and still keeping my gratitude for pregnancy, sickness and all.
Spilling the Beans: Part II
I decided that letting the rest of the world in our baby news would take place on Father's Day. I didn't want to make a huge deal out of it, so I decided that making a simple post on Facebook would be the simplest and easiest way to let everyone know at the same time our secret.
I was overwhelmed by the amount of well wishes and support we received. I spent the entire day crying, which has definitely increased since my pregnancy, although I've always been quite a crier. It was just such a warm feeling to know how excited people were for us.
It was also a hard moment for me to share this news because I have been on the other side of the fence so many times that I didn't want to hurt any of my friend's feelings who have been trying to conceive. I know about a dozen women who are having fertility problems and the last thing I wanted to do was make them feel saddened by their own pregnancy status. When you are trying to get pregnant, but are unable to do so, it can be heartbreaking to hear of other people's success. I didn't want to be the cause of their heartbreak, but at the same time, I wanted to share our happy news with all of our friends and family.
I was overwhelmed by the amount of well wishes and support we received. I spent the entire day crying, which has definitely increased since my pregnancy, although I've always been quite a crier. It was just such a warm feeling to know how excited people were for us.
It was also a hard moment for me to share this news because I have been on the other side of the fence so many times that I didn't want to hurt any of my friend's feelings who have been trying to conceive. I know about a dozen women who are having fertility problems and the last thing I wanted to do was make them feel saddened by their own pregnancy status. When you are trying to get pregnant, but are unable to do so, it can be heartbreaking to hear of other people's success. I didn't want to be the cause of their heartbreak, but at the same time, I wanted to share our happy news with all of our friends and family.
Time to Spill the Beans
Mark and I had decided that we would keep the baby our little secret until the end of the first trimester. In the past we had told people about the pregnancy only to have to go back and tell them that I had ended up losing the baby. That is not a fun experience at all, so we were going to keep our mouths shut until we had made it to safer territory.
I decided that telling our families together would be the best bet. Since Father's Day was approaching, we decided that having dinner in celebration of Father's Day would be a great way to let everyone in on our secret. Mark had to work on Father's Day, so we scheduled dinner for Friday, June 17th at Chili's and invited both sets of our parents.
We waited till the end of dinner when I passed out a gift bag to each set of parents. Inside they found a picture frame with the baby's first sonogram prominently displayed. A lot of "Ohhhs" and "Ahhhs" escaped from their lips as they looked at the picture, immediately followed by a litany of congrats. I seriously think my father almost broke his face from smiling so hard and Mark's dad looked as though he was going to cry. It was a great family moment full of love. They proceeded to ask lots of questions and I'm sure we would have been there all night, if I hadn't eventually ushered us out of the restaurant.
I'm very happy the unveiling went so well.
I decided that telling our families together would be the best bet. Since Father's Day was approaching, we decided that having dinner in celebration of Father's Day would be a great way to let everyone in on our secret. Mark had to work on Father's Day, so we scheduled dinner for Friday, June 17th at Chili's and invited both sets of our parents.
We waited till the end of dinner when I passed out a gift bag to each set of parents. Inside they found a picture frame with the baby's first sonogram prominently displayed. A lot of "Ohhhs" and "Ahhhs" escaped from their lips as they looked at the picture, immediately followed by a litany of congrats. I seriously think my father almost broke his face from smiling so hard and Mark's dad looked as though he was going to cry. It was a great family moment full of love. They proceeded to ask lots of questions and I'm sure we would have been there all night, if I hadn't eventually ushered us out of the restaurant.
I'm very happy the unveiling went so well.
We've Made It!!!
June 13th marked the beginning of my 13th week. I had made it through the first trimester (although the little pregnancy book says the first trimester lasts through the 13th week, I'm going by the 4 weeks per month route - plus I was really anxious to make it this far!)
Mark and I were both escatic about this. We both expressed how making it this far really solidified that this pregnancy had a real chance of making it. We finally gave ourselves permission to talk about the future and the fact that we are well on our way to being parents. We had refrained from having these conversations before this point because we did not want to get ourselves too happy and then lose the pregnancy. This had happened in the past and it made getting over the grief that much more difficult.
But, now we were in full celebratory mode! We have not stopped talking since about how happy and blessed we are. We have had discussions about everything and anything related to the baby, from diapers, to when they will be allowed to ride a dirt bike, to what we would do if we ever caught them smoking, to the expectations of their school years and yadda yadda yadda. I am so blessed to have a husband who is so excited and willing to be a father. It has made me love him all that much more.
Mark and I were both escatic about this. We both expressed how making it this far really solidified that this pregnancy had a real chance of making it. We finally gave ourselves permission to talk about the future and the fact that we are well on our way to being parents. We had refrained from having these conversations before this point because we did not want to get ourselves too happy and then lose the pregnancy. This had happened in the past and it made getting over the grief that much more difficult.
But, now we were in full celebratory mode! We have not stopped talking since about how happy and blessed we are. We have had discussions about everything and anything related to the baby, from diapers, to when they will be allowed to ride a dirt bike, to what we would do if we ever caught them smoking, to the expectations of their school years and yadda yadda yadda. I am so blessed to have a husband who is so excited and willing to be a father. It has made me love him all that much more.
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